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Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy Timeline

Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy timeline, storyline, and story arc. All of these are official and 100% canon

[Bold Text: Important event / Month and Day]

[Italic Text: Semi-important event]

[Underlining Text: Not-so important event]

[Bold and Italic Text: Very important event and relevant to the Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy story arc]

1612

  • October 21: S.S. Punkster is finished being created and sent to the island of Kött to discover local treasures
  • October 22: Sailors of the S.S Punkster begin building settlements on the island of Kött
    • A brigade of canoes row across the Atlantic Ocean; a mountain of salt crushes all 2,000 canoes
  • October 24: Captain Toast, captain of the S.S. Punkster, catches a rare disease on the island of Kött an dies a painful death two days later
    • Travelers land on the island of Ada to establish secret worldwide government testing, The Republic of Ada, and plans to create a superlaser
    • Hovercraft technology was discovered by Daniel McTeeth, but kept it a secret until his death
    • Lieutenant Jack of the S.S Punkster steals a sandwich from the ship's kitchen; he was stabbed a few minutes later and died
  • October 25: First Lieutenant Pea is promoted to Captain by orders of Captain Toast after learning of his illness
    • The S.S. Punkster is demolished for more resources to build tools and huts
    • Daniel McTeeth is shot dead by Republic of Ada troops; his body was retrieved and his hovercraft technology blueprints were buried with him
  • October 26: Captain Toast dies a painful death from an unknown disease
    • Captain Pea sends letters for more ships to arrive at the island of Kött; no one arrives
    • Republic of Ada troops storm the island of Kött in hopes to find resources for their superlaser
  • October 27: The S.S. Punkster crew and the Republic of Ada have a dispute and battle eachother for the treasure
  • October 28: While the Battle of Kött occurred, a crew member of the S.S. Punkster found and opened the island's treasure
    • The Battle of Kött was won by no one after the treasure opened a portal and killed everyone on the island

1637

  • January 4: Advanced lettuce farming techniques invented by Johnny Leaf moves to the village of Kajah
    • Mike Steak invents advanced cabbage farming techniques to compete against Johnny Leaf
    • Sike Meaks invents advanced potato farming techniques to compete against Johnny Leaf and Mike Steak
    • Annual farming technique market arrives at the village of Kajah
    • Vince Mince plans to sabotage the main plaza of Kajah and ruin the advanced farming techniques market
    • Vince Mince is shot dead by Officer Bob
  • January 5: Johnny Leaf kills Mike Steak and Sike Meaks and steals their advanced farming techniques
    • Big York starts construction

1641

  • November 30: Big York finishes construction and becomes one of the biggest cities
    • Abe "Townie Downs" Idiot and Mark Books begin an electoral vote for mayor of Big York
    • Fish Hooks Bar is established in Big York
    • Card Store is established in Big York
      • Card Store is burned down instantly
        • No one is saved
  • December 2: Abe "Townie Downs" Idiot wins the electoral vote against Mark Books
    • Bums rush the Big York City Hall for government information
    • 7^ Drink Store is bombed by The Soda Thieves Gang; drinks stolen
    • Traffic to Big York becomes a concern; no one does nothing
  • December 14: Mark Books hires scientists to create Techno-Stasis Machine Mark VII
  • December 16: Techno-Stasis Machine Mark VII is finished; Mark Books enters the stasis machine and set to be released on July 15th, 2000

1707

  • March 23: H-23 bomb is created and tested at Point Bravo test site
    • Shirtman idea is discussed by Shirtman officials
    • Potato harvesting ban law is sent to government officials by Potato International Awareness (P.I.A)
    • Potato harvesting ban law is immediately revoked by government officials
  • March 24: Happy Man travels back in time to March 24, 1707, to destroy the idea of the Yogurt Foundation Agency (Y.F.A)
    • Odessa Cubbage travels back in time to March 24, 1707, to stop Happy Man from destroying the idea of the Yogurt Foundation Agency (Y.F.A)
    • Happy Man is critically wounded by Odessa Cubbage but manages to escape back to the present

1770

  • March 5th: Gimbobob Matbule', Colonel of the US army is shot in battle defending Boston from invading British forces
  • September 10th: Archaeologist Big'E Smalls uncovers some debris of the long lost S.S Punkster, upon gathering the secret resources and powers, he received Supernatural powers and immortality.
  • December 25th: Santa claus and the pre-shirtsman era lead meet and discuss technologies related to hovercraft
  • December 29th: Daniel McTeeth's corpse is recovered and cremated, and the remains were then sold to the black market. There current whereabouts are unknown.
  • December 30th: Gimbobob Matbule's wife, Lucy Schwee gives birth to Gub Matbule

1871

  • October 29th: Fredrik Buler (Fredrick Buler's father) is born
    • 27 pounds of macaroni is bought by Jack Ham
    • Rice plantations are burnt by hobos

1900

  • June 2nd: Fredrick Buler is born
    • Majority of macaroni factories are closed down due to protesters and riots against macaroni harm
    • Yogurt factories open due to popular demand
  • July 4th: Wallet industries open around Big York National Forest

1942

  • November 25th: Fredrick Buler robs the National Weaponry Treasure Museum North-West of Big York National Forest with a wood baseball bat; 17 dead and 31 injured after the robbery - this marks Fredrick's first robbery
    • Fredrick Buler hijacks an industrial van to escape from police
      • Fredrick Buler escapes local police forces from driving into a V-22 Osprey; Fredrick hijacked the aircraft and took all crew members hostage
    • Yogurt factories deplete their supplies after popular demand of strawberry flavored yogurt
    • Ink factories are depleted of supplies due to a massive ink spillage
    • December 3rd: Fredrick Buler is placed on a government watchlist
      • Brick-n-Things brick shop is robbed by misfit gangsters

1985

  • June 9th: Martha Matbule rises through the ranks of the USMC, reaching the rank of Colonel
  • November 6th: The shirtsman corps of Intergalactic Affairs is established, spacecraft technologies begin their experimentation at an abandoned german airfield.
  • December 15th: The Ol' Dublins original oat cereal is created and distributed to stores worldwide
    • George James, Jr. (later known as Big Hater. III) is born
    • National Weaponry Treasure Museum makes its grand re-opening in Big York South-District after the robbery back in 1942; millions of weapon fanatics awaited the re-opening
  • December 18th: Martha Matbule meets her future husband, and together they settle down in a quiet town north of Pennsylvania

1990

  • March 8th: The Shirtsman Corps of Intergalactic Affairs makes contact with the first neutral alien race beyond the solar system. Knowledge of the aliens and their own spacecraft however is kept hidden from the public.
  • September 10th: Joseph Dillian Matbule (Meatball Man) Is born.
  • November 15th: Ol' Dublins produces a cinnamon flavor to their cerial.
  • November 20th: Captain Crunch sets out with the US navy to discover the lost city of Rut'goo. However, moments after sailing its revealed a ship made of cereal will not float. Due to his failures, Captain Crunch is demoted and kicked from the Naval Corps
  • December 9th: The Shirtsman corps of Intergalactic Affairs successfully builds and sends their first Manned Spacecraft into Orbit.
  • December 10th: Attempted hijackings from a small band of troublemakers are thwarted by the powerful Big'E Smalls.
    • The troublemakers sought to expose the Shirtsmen to the Public.

2000

  • January 1st: Joseph Dillian Matbule Makes his first Meatball
  • March 2nd: Santa Claus cuts ties with the Shirtsman corps of Intergalactic Affairs, a hit is placed on him however he is currently last reported alive and well.
    • Toolie-Leaf herb researched; dangerous chemicals reported
    • Ol'Dubblins protesters riot outside of Big York City Hall due to lack of Ol'Dubblins Cinnamon Flavor
    • George James, Jr. (Big Hater. III) releases his first debut album titled "Big Hate H&tEs Tha $treetz"
  • April 5th: George James, Jr. (Big Hater. III) is invited for a interview about his latest debut album
    • Latest ratings for "Big Hate H&tEs Tha $treetz" have reached 1.5, with reviews "The worst rapper ever"
  • July 8th: Hector Boyarde officially sponsors his company with the Shirtsman corps of Intergalactic Affairs
    • Old Johnny orders 2,074 boxes of Ol'Dubblins Cinnamon Flavor cereal and burns them in his backyard
    • Ol' Slim orders 2,671 boxes of Ol'Dubblins cereal and has them delivered to Old Johnny's house
    • Big Slim arrives to the Ol' West in Big York National Desert and establishes the Big Ol' Slim Drunken Hut
  • July 15th: Mark Books is released from the Techno-Stasis Machine Mark VII and starts his electoral vote for mayor in Big York
    • Big Slim's bar has gained $50,000 dollars within one week of opening the Big Ol' Slim Drunken Hut
  • July 28th: Mark Books wins the electoral vote against Hane Shane

2002

  • January 19th: Spencer Scutt falls into a vat of radioactive mouthwash, becoming toothmann, the first globally recognized superhero.
  • February 21st: Captain Crunch sues the Ol'Dubblins cereal brand causing the company to go bankrupt
    • Another lawsuit was filed outlawing the cereal globally due to 0.01% of its contents containing Toolie-Leaf.
  • March 8th: The first Shirtsman Destroyer vessel is launched into orbit, and begins the construction of the EDF (Earth Defense Fleet)
  • March 17th: The first Shirtsman scout vessel is sent for testing in Big York National Desert; the ship crash landed and was scavenged by Desert Councils - all crew members were taken hostage

2003

  • January 6th: The extremely unhygienic Lady Luswee contacts the governments top scientists to perfect the art of tooth-decay. As a result, she becomes powerful with the skill, vowing to destroy clean teeth, becoming the first globally recognized Super-Villan
  • February 9th: The Agency is founded, and funded by government officials, by James Agentise with a pledge to stop Superheroes, Supervillians, and criminal scum. Hundreds of agents are hired within one week
    • Mike Usense is hired by The Agency and is later promoted as Secretary of the Civil Council of Agent Defense (C.C.A.D)
    • Alice Spice is hired by The Agency and is promoted to Head Secretary of Council Agency Deployment (C.A.D)
      • Mister Ike is promoted from Agent Officer to Secretary's Assistant of Council Agency Deployment (C.A.D)
  • August 20th: Meteors containing 0.001% urfasionium crash in The Ol' Wastes; urfasionium harvested 2 days later
    • Space-21 Search Vessel established by Shirtsman Corps is launched and sent to Haumea

2004

  • January 1st: Europe, The United Kingdom, Canada, and the United States converse and sign the Deceleration of Prosperity, and begin expeditions to the long lost island and ruins of Kött
  • February 9th: The shirtsman corps of Intergalactic Affairs contacts another alien race. Technologies are exchanged resulting in the first Fleet-Leader Vesse (Dubbed Mother-ship) being created, with six more expected to be done soon
  • May 8th: Someone makes a sandwich. It is the most amazing, pristine and beautiful one thus created in human history up until this point
  • May 9th: Construction on Shirtsman fleet-leaders concludes. The EDF nears completion.
    • The Shirtsman corps reaches a workforce of over 100 Million Human workers.
  • June 12th: The shirtsman corps of Intergalactic Affairs sends a detachment fleet lead by one Fleet-Leader to Mars. Factories are erected and vessel production moves off-earth, and onto mars.
  • November 2nd: Joseph Dillian Matbule Successfully beats up and defeats the local school bully, Cementing him as the Cool Kid.
    • Shortly after he accidentally slaps his crush, making him the class Bum once more.

2005

  • March 9th: Gabe Newell meets with a Grey Goo man who claims to be from EA. Hostility ensues and the goo person is slain.
    • Todd Howard is informed and begins to study from a far
  • March 20th: The expedition of Kött pays off, an abandoned tomb underground is unearthed and from it an arc is recovered.
  • December 25th: Santa Claus meets with the UN, which then attempt to get hovercraft details from him, Santa Claus single-handedly cartwheels out of the meeting before any damage is done, or secrets are exposed.
  • December 28th: Big'E Smalls time travels back in time to 4.5 GA observe the formation of earth itself.

2006

  • January 1st: The arc is moved to Antarctica, shortly after it is opened. The Twig of Twilights Turn is discovered.
    • Some mortals who stare at the twig are burned alive instantly, the twig is moved underground into a secure vault sponsored by Chef Boyardee.
  • May 2nd: Joseph Dillian Matbule remains unsuccessful with the ladies.
  • May 3rd: Gabe Newell becomes a temporarily recognized superhero, after defending big york from Todd Howard's expedition. The two continue to search for the Twig of Twilight's Turn.
  • May 4th: Odessa Time Travels to the Center of Big York to attempt to cease the hunt for the Twig, However creates a time rift in the process
    • Odessa is Unsuccessful and all evil traits are sucked out from him
      • Upon Odessa's Return to his present, He discovers he accidentally aided in the spawn of Evil Odessa.
  • May 8th: Big York's local resident British guy protests the Captain Crunch HQ.
    • Shortly after, Captain Crunch himself leaves the HQ and gets into a heated fight with the civilian.
      • The civilian revealed he is a member of the Agency. And cuts funding of the Captain Crunch company.
    • Captain Crunch gathers his men and sets out north to Washington, and forms the Institute of Cereal.

2007

  • January 9th: The Shirtsman Corps of Intergalactic affairs fleet completes construction. Topping at..
    • 20,761 Star-Fighters
    • 978 Destroyer Vessels
    • 432 Nebulan Frigates
    • 23 Fleet-Leaders
  • And a crew of over 300 Million Human workers.
  • January 20th: The Shirtsmen encounter the first Hostile alien race. The fleet successfully defends earth from invasion however one capital ship is on a crash course to the center of Big York.
    • Gabe Newell uses his temporary superhero powers to attempt to rapell the crashing ship, to no success.
      • Putting aside their differences, Todd Howard aids Gabe Newell in defending the city, shoving the debris into space
        • The public is told the debris was 'Another Weather Baloon' to which they all somehow agree.
  • March 8th: An infamous water distribution company arises with an anonymous leader. The company is quick to win the title of infamous due to its unnecessarily high prices.
    • Water Distribution Factories close down due to competitive sales
    • Reformed Republic moves platoons to The Ol' Wastes and establishes outposts and attempts to form order
  • March 21st: Leslie Steak becomes the world leader in Cabbage distribution.
  • September 10th: Shortly after a divorce with his wife, Petty Criminal Sheppard Lettuce is released from jail, and joins the Big York mafia.

2010

  • August 8th: Big'E Smalls boards a Shirtsman Vessel, tweaking some data and marking Happyman as a wanted offender of the Shirtsmen.
  • November 27th: Mafia businessman Ron Linguine attempts to pass a law to ban all spaghetti products throughout nations in favor of linguine pasta
    • Lawyers and associates discuss the banishment of spaghetti
    • Ol'Dubblins cereal production shuts down after bankruptcy and lawsuits
  • November 30th: Ron Linguine Successfully purchases all mafias in Big York and surrounding cities
    • Using the remaining funds, he joins them all into one, Militarizes them, and equips them with the most expensive full body armor-suits available at the time, the 'Original Army' is formed.
    • However, due to lack of remaining currency, they are armed with western lever-action rifles.
  • November 29th: Joseph Dillian Matbule is disgusted and horrified by the act and protests against the law
    • Matbule drops out of his College courses in favor of a Law Degree
    • At this time, He meets Big'E Smalls for the first time
  • December 1st: Big'E Smalls meets with Odessa Cubbage and Happy-Man, to where he reveals that Happy-Man is 'Wanted' by the Shirtsmen.
    • Big'E Smalls regenerates as a ghost-like entity
    • Macaroni factories close down due to lack of products, revenue, and materials
    • Yogurt factories are bombed by Big York mafia members
    • Hobos gain dominance over Big York South-East district; police and citizens are overruled and taken hostage
  • December 3rd: Odessa Cubbage leads a battalion against The Agency in an attempt to gain control over Big York North-District and push The Agency back
    • George James, Jr. (Big Hater. III) moves to The Ol' Wastes and begins construction on his three-story shack
    • Big Slim closes down the Big Ol' Slim Drunken Hut and moves to Texas after crime rates rise in Big York and Big York National Desert
    • Mark Books is impeached from City Hall and Mayor status is removed; he was brutally trampled in a stampeding riot
  • December 8th: Hedd Fredd, town slicer begins to experiment with technologies related to teleportation in his basement, out of public eyes.
  • December 28th: The Reformed Republic battalions moves to the border of Big York National Desert for an onslaught

2011, The first Great Awakening.

  • August 3rd: Unsuccessful with his attempts at a law degree, Matbul takes things into his own hands and seeks out to find the aforementioned slicer. After making contact, the slicer arranges a meeting two days from then. For a victory lunch, Matbul proceeded to the local Rat Cafe. In the Cafeteria, minimum wage chef and waiter, Jason Freed experiences an argument with his boss, and threatens to fire him. Matbul sits down and orders One singular meatball, the two meeting for the first time. Events transpire, and the place is swarmed by the Originals. Matbul and Jason go into hiding for the following two days.
  • August 5th: Big York dissolves into chaos, riots ensue daily and the law is on the verge of passing. The sandwich record is broken by an unknown entity. Matbul and Jason meet with Hedd Fredd, and illegally purchase weapons. A lever action rifle and a Double Barreled shotgun. Ron Linguine sets up a permanent base of operations in Big York's Sewage Depository. Joseph Dillion Matbul takes up the title of 'MeatBall Man' The first power-less Human to become a recognized superhero. Jason Freed takes up the title of 'Spaghetti Boy' The first Sidekick in History .The Two heroes blasted their way through the city, making there way to 'TippityToppity Towers'. Hours of interrogation ensued by both heroes, they quickly learned about the individual behind the horrendous law. Big'E Smalls walks into the room, and hands the two slips of paper, pass-codes to Ron's fortress. Hedd Fredd begins construction of a vehicle of sorts in his garage. The two Heroes sack the safe of the building, obtaining millions in dollars. Meatball Man purchases the temporary services of the Male 07 army's 212th attack platoon.
  • August 6th: The Male 07 attack platoon begins their 1 mile charge to Ron's fortress, lead by our two heroes. The sandwich record is broken once more. Chaos in Big York dies down, as the Shirtsmen, under the code name 'Government Reserve' show up and repel the illegal Original Army forces. Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy reached the fortress and climbed to the mid-levels. The Male 07's provide Cover on the surface, however are wiped out to an, as of then unknown entity. Meatball man and Spaghetti boy are stopped by Fredrick Buler, who wiped out their platoon and cought up at inhumanly fast speeds. An intense firefight ensued. Fredrick is knocked off the tower by Spaghetti Boy and Meatball Man's combined effort. He survives the fall. Meatball Man successfully infiltrates the tower's command center, the defenses of the tower were haste-fully disabled. Big'E Smalls blasts his way through the Originals and regroups with Meatball Man, handing him a cylindrical shaped Bomb. Instructing him to plant it at the top office's desktop printer. After a day of fighting Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy reached Ron Linguine's office.
  • August 7th: Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy confront Ron Linguine for the first time. Ron Linguine would dispatch his hidden Original Guard, which were hiding under the carpet. Meatball Man simply shoots them, their badass introduction proving useless. After heated discussion Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy engage in hand to hand combat with Ron. In the chaos, Meatball man plants the bomb on Ron's printer. Big'E Smalls, through means unknown shows up at the window with an attack helicopter, seriously maiming Ron Linguine and flying the two Heroes to safety on-top of Tippity-Toppity tower. Meatball Man and Spaghetti Boy detonated the Nuke. A massive chunk of Big York completely destroyed. Shirtsmen Forces and ships immediately move the debris and unearthed terrain into space and around mars for additional factory defense Through unknown means Spaghetti Boy disappears for years. Due to Meatball Man's true identity as Joseph Matbul never being revealed, He returns to his previous life, living off the wealth he stole from Ron Linguine, however remaining in his Shitty Flat. Miles Away, Sheppard Lettuce watches, his hero decimated before his eyes.
  • August 8th: With no leadership or funding, the entire Original Army spreads throughout Big York and goes into hiding